So after knocking out 3 entries yesterday, I decided to keep the flowing, and I asked one of my sisters what to write about today. She said, "memories," and after I pondered for a bit, the juices started flowing. [I will take more suggestions for entries to challenge myself, so feel free to hit me up with suggestions and I'll see what I can do.]
Memory plays a powerful role in relationships. Anniversaries are built around the memory and celebration of a significant day in the life of a relationship. The capacity to reach into our minds and recall/relive a beautiful moment can bring a smile and a warmth to our hearts. This can be especially true in times when things aren't ideal. Maybe your loved one is away, or maybe you are experiencing a tough stretch in the relationship. At times, it can be necessary to draw upon memories of the better times to remember why you are together in the first place. And memories don't even have to be about relationships. I like to remember simpler times in my life and put things in perspective. I like to recall moments when God moved and find hope in the midst of trying times.
But as with everything, I have to advise balance, because living in the memories can steal or even distort the present. I heard a preacher once say that present difficulties can make us romanticize our past and view the present in a worse light. Her example was the Israelites who were currently in the wilderness. They saw their current place (hungry in the wilderness) as so bad that they longed for the past (slavery). Because the past is so much further away than the present staring us in the face, it's easy to get swept away by the imagined beauty. I know that there are times when I wish I was back in undergrad, because there were some amazing times and experiences in my life.... But in reality, I am so much freer now, and I know so much more than I did then. So as much as I enjoyed that time, you couldn't pay me to go back, because where I am now (even with its issues and hiccups) is better than where I was.
Another potential hazard with memories is that they can be so potent that they shape our mind and behavior. Yes, there are probably events in your life (good and bad) that have changed your view on things or your way of thinking, but holding on to those memories can do more harm than good. This can be especially true if you are looking at the event in a way that doesn't properly reflect what happened. For example, my dad worked a lot when I was a kid. I interpreted this as him not loving me, because he didn't spend time with me. As an adult, I understand that it's necessary for adults to work. It wasn't a personal indictment on me, but for a long time, I saw it that way. So, even though I remembered things a certain way, that didn't reflect reality, and it gave me skewed view of life until I corrected it.
So, I say enjoy your memories. Look through pictures. Read through old journals. I know that doing so helps me to remember the beauty that life has brought me (even in the painful times). It also helps me to see how far I've come. It helps me to appreciate the people and things in my life. It helps me to appreciate the person I've become and the growth I've experienced. Just remember that you have to live in the present.
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