Day 223 - Puppy

“The difference between ‘butterflies’ in your stomach and actual love is the difference between seeing a picture of an adorable puppy and actually owning a dog.” – Kevin Michael Roberts
When I first read this statement, it struck me as one of the truest and most relevant statements I’d heard in a long time. I shared it with one of my friends, and she agreed. So let’s do what I do best and take a closer look.
When seeing a picture of an adorable puppy, you see the ideal. You are seeing a picture of a reality, but it is a reality that has likely been posed and photo-shopped, a moment set in time to present a desirable picture. And as a visually stimulated society, we have become impressed and enthralled with the looks and image of things. We are obsessed with celebrities and their looks, copying their fashion, their looks, their body shapes, etc. While we do have eyes for a reason, the fact that we need 3-D and HD TV and the art of radio has been all but lost in a lot of ways says that we are fixated on looking at things that please us. So, we can see an adorable puppy and react, feeling a flutter and even an emotional connection. But the moment is fleeting, as is the feeling, because there is only so much that can be gained from a photograph. Even though a picture is worth 1000 words, love has an infinite vocabulary, so this picturesque moment pales in comparison to the depth and complexity of actual relationship.
Even if I were to see that dog on the street being walked by its owner and get to pet and play with it for a bit, I would find a connection and an excitement in that moment. I would get to interact with more than the picture, bonding with the actual object of my affection as we enjoyed a precious moment together. I would equate this to a date or even a one-night stand. There is an excitement and even a fulfillment of a desire. The problem is that this interaction is a brief one that usually finds the two interacting on their best behavior, putting forward what they think the other wants so as to keep the “butterflies” and the high of the moment going.
But when you actually own and live with that puppy, you get to deal with house breaking the puppy, feeding it, taking it to the vet, walking it multiple times a day, dog breath, fleas, etc. You have to deal with the good, the bad, and the ugly of the reality of a dog and all the responsibility it entails. At the same time, you get the joy of being greeted with love when you come home, play time, companionship, and the benefits of being in a relationship that has been proven to provide health benefits over a lifetime. The same is true of love. While you have the reality of having to constantly communicate and work through things, seeing a person at the best and worst, disagreements and compromises, and even possible hurt and pain, you also get the beauty and healing power of love, companionship, intimacy, and the joy of sharing life with someone.
Is there anything wrong with admiring a picture of an adorable puppy? Not at all. I’ve often looked at a dog on TV or seen a friend’s dog and thought I’d like one of my own, but the reality is that this is a passing thought, and I’m not in the place financially or time-wise to be able to take care of a dog. And I think that we should be able to equally discerning about our ability to be in a relationship. We often see other people in love – be it on TV or in relationships around us – and we want that too, but we need to be able to real with ourselves as to whether that would be the best thing for us at this given moment. Will we always feel “ready” for a relationship when the opportunity presents itself? No. But if you just got out of a 3 year relationship last week or if you just had your heart seriously broken a month ago, you may want to take a little bit more time to heal before you try dating again. Let Love and some good friendship and some time heal you before you attempt to open something new.