Day 40 - Love Languages

It's been a while since I thought about the love languages, but they crossed my mind the other day as I was thinking about my overall relational interactions, so I figured I'd write about them.  For those who don't know, Gary Chapman developed the concept that there were 5 ways in people tend to give and experience love.  They are as follows:

1. Physical Touch - this is my personal #1.  It means that when you hug, hold, caress, kiss, or otherwise touch me (in a caring way, let me be clear), then I feel the most loved.  For me, there is something about the warmth and connection of a caring touch that can touch my soul and assure me of real care.
2. Words of Affirmation - equally as important for me are words.  Because I'm a writer, words are my preferred medium, and so words are extremely important to me.  So, the words of love, care, affirmation, and affection are gifts to people who love like this.  Everyone appreciates words to a degree, but people who have this as their primary gift take words (both good and bad) to heart.  I'm not sure how many people have multiple primary languages, but I do.  If you touch me without words, eventually I will wonder about your intentions.  So for me, they work together.
3. Quality Time - for some people, just spending time together is a way of letting them know that they are dearly loved.  Togetherness and time spent mean more than anything else.
4. Gifts - for others, a gift, be it a card, a cupcake, or a car, receiving a gift makes them feel like they are undeniably loved.  What the gift is matters less than the fact that they are receiving the gift.  
5. Acts of Service - the last love language is for people who feel that they are loved when people do things for them like take out their trash, wash their car, wash the dishes, etc.  They appreciate people taking care of those things in life for them.

Now, I think it's possible to have more than one.  The ideal situation would include bits of each, but there would be an emphasis on the primary love language of each person.  The beauty of these languages is that everyone has them, and so you can seek them in your children, your co-workers, your friends, your parents, your romantic relationships, etc.  Know yours and get to know that of others - self-awareness and communication = good relationships.