So, I
was on Facebook the other day, and I saw that one of my friends had posted a
video. I most likely would have scrolled
by, but the lyrics from the song that he used as a caption caught my eye. When I listened to it, I was immediately
touched by the universal appeal and resonance of this song. Just about everyone I know (myself included) who
has been in a relationship has experienced what this song talks about to some
degree. Let’s see about what Ms Felicia
Renae had to say.
“You
already know me. As far as I can tell, it
seems like everything is going pretty well.
Cuz I know that you love me – I don’t doubt that much. But sometimes I’ve got questions, and I
wonder if I should trust you with my heart.
And I know you’d never hurt me purposely, but what if something happens
that we can’t foresee? Will we try and
work it through? I really wanna be with
you. Reassure me. Reassure me.”
The couple seems to be in a relationship, and things are going well –
the relationship is good, the love is there.
But for her part, she is unsure.
Despite what she sees and experiences in the relationship, questions
linger in her mind. Can she really trust
her heart to this person? She knows that
she is loved, so any pain inflicted will be unintentional, but it will be pain nonetheless. She’s concerned that things outside their control
will happen or even that problems will arise that they may not even try to push
through. She wants to be together, but
she needs some reassurance.
“Looking
at my history, you’d see why I’m broken.
Even if it’s real this time, I don’t wanna blame you for it. Cuz I’m scared you gon hurt me, I’m not giving
you my all. Why can’t I trust you with
my heart?” It seems that her history is
the cause for her questions and uncertainty.
Not only has she been hurt, but she even describes herself as
broken. She admits that even if this love
and relationship are real, she is having trouble getting beyond her past to
embrace what is now available to her.
Because of this fear, she has decided to hold some of herself back from
the relationship, afraid to give her all and risk being completely devastated
as she undoubtedly has been before. Yet,
even in this decision, she wonders about the validity of her decision and even
desires to be able make that transition.
“If I
cross the line, will I be asking for it – all the happiness of life, all the
pain of disappointment? I don’t wanna
blame you for everything I’ve been through.
I’ve been down before, and of my heart, there’s not much left to break,
so don’t let me down. I won’t question
your love. If you give it enough, we’ll
be fine, we’ll survive and I’ll stand, I’ll stand by your side.” She’s been thinking about venturing and
allowing her heart to be completely open, but she’s afraid that she will
receive joy as well as pain, because life inevitably brings both. Yet, she doesn’t want to take out what she’s
been through on someone who hasn’t done anything to hurt her. It’s just that she has been through so much
with her heart and because of love that she feels that she can’t take another
blow. She asks her friend not to
disappoint her or let her down. She is now
making the decision to trust. She has
seen strong potential, and because of this, she is agreeing to push forward and
open up, remaining steadfast and willing to try as long as her love does the
same.
“Somewhere
deep inside me, and something told me ‘no,’ and that’s why I couldn’t give you
my all. But real love is coming to
me. I’m holding on with everything till I
give someone deserving my time, my love, and all of, of my heart.” Admittedly, this last bit confuses me a bit, but
I believe that it’s saying that, despite the good that was there, her intuition
made her pause. There was an unshakable
feeling that caused her to hold back.
But she has the faith to believe that real love will find her, and she
will hold out until that day comes and she can give all of herself. It seems that things have shifted. Initially, fear was what held her back. Now, it seems that she has grown and been
able to get beyond the grip of fear. Somehow,
she has been empowered to be self-actualized enough to know when things are not
right. Though things were good, she is
now strong enough to wait for better.
I can
appreciate both sides of this. I know
what it is to live in fear, seeing possibility but feeling my fear as closely
as I did the love. I also know what is
to be in a relationship that is good but knowing that it is not the fullness of
what I want, need, and deserve. Relationships
and love can be terrifying things, especially when you’ve been hurt
before. To open yourself up and allow
the possibility of someone taking you at your most vulnerable point and hurting you again seems unbearable… but to hide from love, even in a
relationship, causes more issues and pain for both parties involved. Holding back will cause mistrust and constant
conflict, especially when the other person is trying to truly love you and
invest in relationship.
So,
if you’ve been hurt, take the time to allow your heart to heal. And if you find someone willing AND able to love
you in a genuine way, don’t be afraid to let them. Even if the two of you aren’t destined to
walk down the aisle, there is a beauty and a healing in being able to feel and
receive love. And seek the Divine Love
for discernment, because that will be the only way to know if you are
experiencing fear or Divine Guidance to move on. Either way, don’t be afraid to embrace love
as it comes to you, because it is always a gift and a chance to grow.
No comments:
Post a Comment